RHOC: “Come on, are you the first person in the world to ever get pregnant?

I didn’t expect I’d ever say this, but last night’s episode of real Housewives of Orange county was completely terrifying. and not in a “quiet terror of upper-middle class suburban disaffection” way, but in a real, life-or-death, “visceral remind of our own eventual mortality” way. If you’re from an area where outdoor sports are popular, then you probably know, or at least know of, someone who was killed or seriously injured in exactly the kind of accident the cast got into last night.

Making the normal jokey-jokes about everything that lead up to the accident last night feels like it would be in poor taste, but we know that both Tamra and Vicki survived and have fully recovered from their injuries, so let’s tread lightly in that direction, or, at the very least, poke a little fun at Meghan, who would turn out to be the episode’s unlikely villain.

I say “unlikely” because even though I don’t think Meghan’s anyone’s favorite, she didn’t seem like the ice-in-her-veins type, and even if she were, mostly all she talks about is becoming America’s First-Ever pregnant Woman, so there hasn’t been much opportunity yet for to be a monster. That came at the very end of the episode, but first, we had to ensure she’s pregnant. Hun er! Meghan’s pregnant and any average RHOC audience member was probably more excited about it than the man that consented to have his frozen sperm used to knock her up.

Beyond that, most of the episode was spent in preparation to go to Glamis. much ado was made about Heather’s fancy camper that she needed because she’s a princess who just can’t spend a night in a regular RV like Tamra and her plebe family, as well as the foil packets her private chef prepared for her so she could just toss them on the grill without having to operate a salt shaker or cut a vegetable.

The results of Heather’s expenses and efforts were an RV that did not look especially more spacious or comfortable than the others on the inside, but was far shinier on the outside, as well as a meal that tasted probably about the same as everybody else’s because Heather doesn’t know how to use a grill. Heather also seemed to recognize that her special, expensive RV wasn’t stunting quite as hard on the others as she wold have preferred, though, but she didn’t explain why she didn’t have her assistant find her an even better RV instead of just taking Tamra’s recommendation. good help is so hard to find! even in costars.

The episode felt a little difficult to watch at times, and not only because there was a lot more barf than the average hour of real Housewives. we all knew where the whole thing was going, which put me on edge, especially when Heather’s middle school-age son was sent out on an ATV all by himself. He came back fine, of course, and he didn’t seem to go far, but some sort of maternal instinct welled up inside me that was very unpleasant and anxious. That doesn’t happen all that typically when watching a Bravo reality show.

That’s sort of the paradox of reality TV in general, though. shows like real Housewives have one foot in the real and one in the not-real; the characters we see are play-acting staged scenarios that helpfully illustrate real interpersonal conflicts, which have in turn been stoked by the not-real forces of production crews and network programmers and Andy Cohen. The hokey theme parties and obviously contrived sit-down meetings between enemies make it easy to take sides and root for cast members like people root for pro wrestlers, but what happens on the show directly affects the personal lives of reality performers more than it would most other kinds of entertainers. A lot of real Housewives end up divorced after a couple seasons.

Far fewer end up with serious physical injuries like the ones Tamra and Vicki suffered last night, and among other things, it was a stark reminder that the women on the show are all a lot of things other than the characters we see once a week. Seeing anyone strapped to a board and helicoptered to a hospital is jarring, and even more so when you realize that might be the first time in a while that you stopped to consider someone as a human instead of a character.

The accident also made me wonder about the particular circumstances surrounding how this part of the reality TV sausage gets made. If they had been filming a movie or traditional TV show, they’d have received training and guidance from professionals and stunt drivers before zipping around on the dunes. (And, it’s worth noting, they’d all be getting paid much more handsomely for taking on the risk–Bravo is notoriously stingy with its Housewives.) reality contracts are different, so did Bravo just send ’em out to do something obviously dangerous for our collective amusement? Does that maybe describe a lot reality TV?

I can’t answer any of those questions right now, but they’re the ones I’m still thinking about after watching theat vise. Jeg tænker selvfølgelig også stadig på Meghans reaktion på at høre Vicki var blevet livsflyvet til et hospital i nærheden Gå og tjek på hende. og ikke af nogen særlig grund; Hun kan bare ikke lide Vicki meget, det ville have været en smule upraktisk for hendes afslappede weekend, og hun følte ikke som det.

Meghan er stadig en relativt ny husmor, så hun har måske ikke indset på det tidspunkt, hvor hjerteløs det afslag ser ud til at seerne, der lige havde set Vicki, overleve en rollover -nedbrud, opkast over hele Kelly, klynk hjælpeløst og få sat i en helikopter, fordi den lokale Hospitalet kunne ikke håndtere skader så potentielt alvorlige som hendes. Selv hvis Meghan netop havde byttet sine golfskår til tennissko og faldet forbi for at se Vicki i 20 minutter, ville hun have set følsom og storslået ud i at lægge sin personlige utilfredshed med at trøste nogen i åbenlyst behov.

I stedet trak hun på skuldrene og besluttede, at hun foretrak det evige selskab med sin egen uinteresserede mand sammen med Shannon og David, showets mindst sjove par. (Shannon, det skal bemærkes, tigget ud af glamis-turen om at bekymre sig om, at sandet ville genere hendes lunger, men først efter at hun fandt ud af, hvem der var på gæstelisten.) Ikke kun er det objektivt koldhjertet, men det er en skinnende Taktisk fejl i Meghans bestræbelser på at udvide sin historie ud over en graviditet, hun synes ikke engang at overbevise babyens far om at bekymre sig om. Pettiness er en kvalitet, som jeg typisk værdsætter i andre, på en underlig måde, men du skal være selvbevidst nok til at indse, hvornår alle involverede ville drage mere fordel af dig, der søger højere moralsk grund. I næste uge er jeg sikker på, at Kelly vil være glad for at have lidt tid fra at være skurken.